The Twelve Days of Breachmas
My apologies to lyricists everywhere, but this time of year lends ample fodder for the non-musically inclined to play with all the ways a breach occurs at companies everywhere. Grab your bottle of Maalox and hum along. Remember that it's just a song, not what could happen...or is it? Well, I can't answer for other institutions, but I'm sure you've not got a single worry about a data breach happening at your institution.
The Twelve Days of Breachmas
On the fifth day of Breachmas my employees gave to me: five banker Trojans...
On the first day of Breachmas my employees gave to me: one missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the second day of Breachmas my employees gave to me: two unshredded data records in the trash and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the third day of Breachmas my employees gave to me: three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the fourth day of Breachmas my employees gave to me: four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the fifth day of Breachmas my employees gave to me: five banker Trojans, four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the sixth day of Breachmas my employees gave to me: six hackers a-hacking, five banker trojans, four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the seventh day of Breachmas, my employees gave to me: seven insiders a-thieving, six hackers hacking, five banker trojans, four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the eighth day of Breachmas my employees gave to me: eight stolen passwords, seven insiders a-thieving; six hackers hacking, five banker trojans, four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the ninth day of breachmas my employees gave to me: nine phishing emails, eight stolen passwords, seven insiders a-thieving; six hackers hacking, five banker trojans, four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the tenth day of breachmas my employees gave to me: ten thumbdrives a-missing; nine phishing emails, eight stolen passwords, seven insiders a-thieving, six hackers hacking, five banker trojans, four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the eleventh day of breachmas my employees gave to me: eleven lawyers litigating, ten thumbdrives a-missing; nine phishing emails, eight stolen passwords, seven insiders a-thieving; six hackers hacking, five banker trojans, four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
On the twelfth day of breachmas my employees gave to me: twelve regulators enforcing, eleven lawyers litigating, ten thumbdrives a-missing; nine phishing emails, eight stolen passwords, seven insiders a-thieving; six hackers hacking, five banker trojans, four botnets infecting, three unpatched servers, two unshredded data records and a missing laptop loaded with all our new enrollees.
Here's wishing everyone a more successful data protection year in 2009, and let's keep battling the bad guys by keeping our data -- and everyone else's -- safely tucked away, encrypted or not, from those that would like to steal, pilfer, pinch, lift or otherwise make off with it.
